Negative Energy -- The Not-so Silent Killer

At the risk of raising the hackles and attracting the ire of our fine female friends, The Band feels that, as a public service, the following statement must be made regarding PMS.  (oh, I can hear the disdainful mutterings and snippy outbursts already......)  But, all the same, here goes.

Please do attempt to take this in the spirit in which it is intended, that being an attempt to ease and facilitate the all-important and necessary interaction between the sexes.  That being said...

Based on what appears from conversation, discussion and literature to be the average length of time that women suffer (and they do suffer, this is not in dispute) from PMS (about a week, give or take), here's how those numbers play out: One week out of every month equals 25% of the month. Projected out over a year's time, that equals 12 weeks, or 3 months, or a corresponding 25% of the year. One week/month projected out over 79 years (the current average life expectancy of an American woman) comes to a thoroughly depressing 237 months. That's 19.75 years, or 25% of a lifetime. That can't be good.

We are not trying to be critical, obnoxious, or otherwise macho and insensitive, here, though we expect to be accused of such.  The above is simple mathematics, based on what women themselves have to say about how much of their time is affected negatively by PMS.  The Band finds this intolerable, and unacceptable.  Moreso even than how much an average pair of panty hose costs, given how much wear one can expect from them.

Given the real cost of unmanaged PMS -- in misundertandings and hurt feelings, in lost chances and no-win arguments, in wasted time and in shattered relationships -- hell, in tears alone -- we demand that something be done about this.  Immediately.  Your Humble Chronicler believes strongly in the dualistic nature of the universe and existence, as well as in the good to be had from learning how to convert this dualism into something more holistic, something kindler and gentler, even; and we Hereby refuse to believe and further here Rebuke the notion that the female body is, by design, "intended" to experience this level of physical and emotional discomfort on a regular basis.  If that's truly the case -- if some so-called "god" or "creator" meant for this to happen, then fuck it all, 'cuz we aint gonna get anywhere with a higher power who's this UN-enlightened. Brings to mind the old phrase, "Never tell a madman with a shotgun he can't shoot no one."  I mean, there is no reason for this.  It is as unacceptable as anything can get.

The question remains:  Why?

Is it a function of American/E&W. European diets?  Is it tied to stress?  Is it a function of how western civilization has become so completely out of touch with the natural cycles of life in the human organism that women's bodies are screaming "FOUL!!!!!!!" once a month, like clockwork, to everyone within hearing distance??  All I can say is that it isn't right.  Not at all. And something must be done about it.

We wholeheartedly encourage you to write your Congress-person.  And write them immediately.  Before it's too late.

The life you save may be your own.

Thank you for listening.

This has been a Public Service Announcement of TBH.